Change
by Skolli
Summary: Ten years ago, Ise Nanao made a glorious mistake that has come to haunt her. Will she take her life into her own hands and change it for the better or will she do irreparable harm to not only herself but also to one Kyouraku Shunsui? – Shunsui/Nanao
1. Chapter 1

_**Summary:**__ Ten years ago, Ise Nanao made a glorious mistake that has come to haunt her. Will she take her life into her own hands and change it for the better or will she do irreparable harm to not only herself but also to one Kyouraku Shunsui? – Shunsui/Nanao_

_**Rating:**__ M (there will be adult material! If you don't like that, don't read this fic ;)_

_**Disclaimer:**__ Bleach is Tito Kube's, if it was mine, there'd be a LOT more Shunsui/Nanao interaction. I do not make any money with this. This is for fun and entertainment purposes only._

_**A/N:**__ Alright, so I'm right in the middle of my final exams but I've been thinking about this story since the summer and since it seems I can't concentrate on my exams, I'm going to write this fic down. It should be around 4 or 5 chapters long._

_It's a bit different from usual fics but I was so deprived of Nanao as of late in the manga (Seriously?! Where is Nanao? It's like "Find Nemo" but it's "Find Nanao" instead). Anyways, I hope you're going to enjoy the story. The next chapters should be longer than this one._

_Enjoy…

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**Chapter 1****: Change**

"_They always say time changes things, but you actually have to change them yourself." _

_~Andy Warhol_

It was a beautiful day. The sun was shining and Seireitei was bathed in a heated glow. And Nanao, as usual, was found sitting behind her desk doing paperwork.

Nanao didn't mind though. She liked doing paperwork, well, actually, it wasn't one of her preferred tasks but she liked to have everything in perfect order. She liked bringing order into chaos and considering the inaptitude of her 8th Division in this matter, she had ample opportunity to "enjoy" bringing order into the affairs of her Division as its fukutaicho.

So she did the paperwork, more than her fair share that was for sure but letting other, less organised _Shinigami_ have a go at the paperwork just meant more work for her in the end, she had discovered long ago. For example, accounting. The 8th did have an obscure accounting office but after discovering that other officers, for example, thought that sake was an office expense, she never even let anyone else have a_ look_ at that. Considering her Division and its taicho, however, it certainly wasn't too far fetched, their taicho being known as a hard-partying _Shinigami_. Nanao sighed, their taicho. A more complicated man there never had been.

8th Division taicho, Kyouraku Shunsui, seemed foremost easy-going and lazy. "Seemed" being the right word, since, well, he was those things but there was so much more beneath the surface. An unbelievably sharp mind hid behind those deep and warm chocolate coloured eyes and a warrior's heart beat inside his chest.

Nanao sighed at the thought of her taicho_'s_ well-muscled chest. Her thoughts just shouldn't go there.

As if her thoughts had conjured him, her taicho came into the outer reception office with one of his flamboyant entries, probably flirting with every woman in his path. She couldn't see him yet but even from her office with the closed door she could hear him and the giggling of the secretaries and other female officers.

When he arrived at their shared office, he stopped and looked at her, and then blinked, clasping his hands in front of his chest melodramatically.

"Oh, what does my beautiful Nanao-chan do in the stuffy office on such a nice day? She should be outside, swimming in a skimpy bathing suit and enjoying herself!"

An irate tick started in her left eye.

"Taicho, do not call me 'Nanao-chan', Ise-_fukutaicho_ will do perfectly well, and I am in _here_ since you seem to somehow 'forget' to do your paperwork." Gods, how she hated that infernal nickname!

"Ach, paperwork, schmaperwork, come on let's enjoy the sun, Nanao-chan!", as if he had not heard her desire for him to not call her Nanao-chan. Typical.

"I am sorry, Kyouraku-taicho, but I have to respectfully decline." Nanao answered, placing her pen back on her current sheet of paperwork- what was it about again? Oh, yes, a Shinigami wanted a transfer into the 7th Squad, right, fill out this, sign there, cross that, easy, simple. But truth be told, it was more difficult than it should have been with the presence of her taicho standing over her ominously.

"Ach, Nanao-chan, you have to loosen up a bit, enjoy life…" and he waggled his eyebrows suggestively at that as if he was flirting but Nanao knew the truth, and didn't even hear the rest of his _suggestions_.

Nanao knew the truth of it. Had known it for forever it seemed; he might flirt and tease for all he was worth, make suggestive remarks all day long but in the end, he was a cheat. He didn't mean anything with his remarks.

He had practically raised her in his Division. He had tutored her when the pain after losing her hero icon, the previous _fukutaicho_, Yadoumaru Lisa, had become too harsh a lesson and had taken her under his wing. He had taught her, had mentored her and groomed her to be his _fukutaicho_ since he hadn't been able to accept anybody else, it had seemed.

Nanao remembered when even the good-natured Kyouraku Shunsui had grumbled about incompetent fools to a teenaged Nanao. He had put her through her paces all the more to make her strong and capable enough to be his fukutaicho.

Nanao didn't doubt that he had affection for her, never that, but he saw her more as a daughter, or a niece than anything else really. One night about ten years ago and the subsequent events had taught her that. Had taught her like nothing else ever could.

She had grown up right in his view, had gone through puberty, the most awkward phase of a person's life right under his nose and she had hero-worshipped him ever since she joined the squad. She had joined the 8th Division when she was just a child with the firm believe that her taicho was the absolute best out of all the Division taicho and nothing had changed her attitude since then. Truly.

But over the course of time her hero worship had amplified when she had hit her teens and discovered her taicho was actually good looking. And true to his nature as soon as she had started to show womanly curves he had begun to tease her, flirt lightly, nearly softly with her and admittedly she had loved that kind of attention from her taicho.

The light teasing and flirting turned into a hard-core occupation of her taicho once she had grown into "a beautiful flower" as her taicho put it but Nanao could still see the good-natured light in his eyes that said clearly, even if his words didn't, that he still thought of her as the cute little girl who had had a bad case of hero-worship for both her taicho and the then _fukutaicho_.

All that changed, at least for her, one night just a decade ago … but she wouldn't think about that now, couldn't, it hurt too much.

With a jerk she brought herself back from her musings, to find her taicho still in front of her desk, a hopeful expression on his face.

"Maybe another time taicho, I am quite tired and I still have to finish some paperwork or we will get into trouble from the 1st Division, sir." Nanao said.

"Ah, my diligent Nanao-chan, then go home and go into the land of Morpheus to wake refreshed and ready to skinny dip with me." Kyouraku-taicho retorted with a devilish glint in his eyes and a debonair smile on his lips.

Nanao sighed at his reference to Morpheus, the human Greek god of sleep and dreams. Only few knew literature as well as her and he was one of them. It would be fascinating to talk about serious topics and books with him at some point since she was sure he must know them all.

But the skinny dipping comment morphed her face into an angry frown.

"I will surely not skinny dip with you, Kyouraku-taicho, you can do that with Ukitake-taicho."

Her taicho used his hurt puppy dog eyes, "But, but, but Nanao-chan, I don't want to see Ukitake naked!"

Nanao nearly growled, but signed one more form and then got up from her chair abruptly to look her taicho in the eyes.

"If you will excuse me now, sir, I am finished and I will take you up on your offer to let me leave early. Have a nice weekend, Koyuraku-taicho."

And with that Nanao stormed out of the Division Offices back to her flat, not looking back to see the puzzled expression in her taicho's eyes.

God, that stupid man. Stupid Nanao for being in love with such a stupid man.

**O~o~o~O**

Shunsui watched his little _fukutaicho_ leave and smirked benevolently, at least he had gotten her out of the office earlier than she would have left else. His little perfectionist _fukutaicho_ was doing most of the paperwork that was actually supposed to be for the whole office on her own but he had to admit no one was as good at doing it than she was.

He couldn't imagine a better _fukutaicho_ for his Division anymore. She was perfect for the job. Diligent, brave, intensely intelligent and above all else, loyal to her very core.

But she had been behaving very strangely as of late. Easier to aggravate and tease and quicker to explode in a temper. It was all very peculiar, maybe she needed a few days off. Shunsui sighed and headed over to the couch in their vacated office and slowly sank into it. He would have allowed her some days off in a heartbeat, if not for the little matter that practically no paperwork got done while she was away and she would be even more stressed after coming back from a few days off. There just was no winning, he sighed.

But he had to admit she had turned out beautifully from the shy little girl that had joined his squad. It had actually been quite humbling to be an observer while she grew up, seeing her learn and discover new things. No doubt about it, she was one of his favourite people in all of Seireitei. And he trusted her implicitly.

But something had changed. It was small things, just a different glint to her eyes when she looked at him and if he wasn't so observant he would have never noticed it. It had started just a few years earlier, and he had absolutely no idea why.

In so many circumstances, his Nanao-chan was a bit of a mystery to him. She was a very private person and he couldn't fault her that, knowing Seireitei's predisposition for gossip, but Nanao-chan took her privacy to new levels.

He knew she was an avid reader and looked forward to a few nights spent discussing his or her favourites – he was sure she had an excellent taste in her reading material, but it just never seemed to be the right time to suggest a quiet night in, without any teasing.

Teasing had become second nature to him where Nanao-chan was concerned, it was just too much fun to rattle her a bit, but even that had become very different and awkward.

She looks at me accusingly and guiltily all at the same time. He sighed and closed his eyes, a puzzle, that's what Nanao was. He had always loved a good puzzle, and maybe it was time to solve this one. But first a nap.

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_A/N: So that was the first chapter. It feels like forever since I wrote anything, so let me know how I did, what you think of this storyline, any criticism etc_


	2. Memory

**Chapter**** 2: Memory**

"_Nothing fixes a thing so intensely in the memory as the wish to forget it." _

~Michel de Montaigne

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Arriving at home in the late afternoon gave Nanao more free time than she knew what to do with. Looking around her apartment, she sighed, not spotting a single piece out of order or some dust bunnies hiding anywhere that she could clean. Nanao loved her apartment and it showed.

Originally, it had been one room with a very high ceiling but through some planning she now had a living room, a kitchenette and a small library wall, all open planned, with a closed bathroom downstairs and then she had had a platform made that was raised and on which she could simply jump or climb with the steep stairs where her bedroom was. It was unique and it was a great use of space she always thought.

Nanao went over and looked into her fridge, and although she had enough food, nothing looked appealing at the moment so she just got herself a glass of cool water and sat down in her too big chair and had a peek at the book that lay facedown on her coffee table.

It wasn't really as interesting as she had thought it would be when she had borrowed it from the library, maybe she would even take it back before she had finished it, she snorted, yes as if! Because for Nanao it was a sacrilege to not finish a book. She loved books, loved everything about them, the look, the smell, the paper, everything; and in every book wisdom could be found, which was why she could never not read a book from cover to cover. The wisdom might just be on the very last page and Nanao would _never_ skip pages!

So Nanao just sat there until a warm bath started to sound more and more perfect. She got up and headed over to her bathroom and let the water flow into her modest bath tub, it did its purpose. She lighted some clean scented candles, nothing cloying for her, and got some chocolate from her stash – there was no chance she would bathe without at least a taste of the divine goodness.

While her mind drifted, surrounded by bubbles and warm scents Nanao faced her dilemma. The dilemma with her captain.

Other Shinigami believed that she as a woman had impenetrable personal restraint to be able to forsake the temptation he represented. They thought she must have endless willpower to resist him since she was always very cold towards his advances but truth be told, if he was honest in his advances she would jump him instantly and that was the crux of her problem – he wasn't serious since he still saw her as a girl and not a woman. As for the matter of resisting him, she sighed, there had been one night, one night only, where he hadn't seen her as a girl and she hadn't been resisting.

She remembered it so clearly as if it had happened yesterday…

**~o~S~o~**

_Ten Year__s Ago_

It was freaking late, 2 am late, or was that early already?! And Nanao was still on her legs, still shunpoing around Seireitei looking for one particularly absent Shinigami taicho. That would be her own taicho, infamous Kyouraku Shunsui.

Gripping a paper form tightly to herself she shunpoed further after not discovering him at another of his favourite haunts, but the bartender had given her hope and told her he had passed through a few hours earlier. That man! The form she held was supposed to have been signed and ready to go in the afternoon, but apparently he had _forgotten_ and now she was running around looking for him as if he was a wayward child. The gall!

If that form wasn't in the 1st Division by 6 am she would not only have to stand before the soutaicho and explain herself (so not happening) but she would also have to research and put the form together from scratch again (even less happening) which was why she would find her taicho! She had another four hours. Four hours in which she had to get one meagre little signature, it didn't sound too hard right, right?! But knowing from experience, it was certainly a task to be reckoned with.

*****

One hour and 5 bars later she found him. Well, kind of, since currently he was residing underneath a table - too sloshed to sit upright. What the -, she couldn't believe her taicho was this drunk! He might enjoy a drink or two but strangely enough he was rarely _that_ drunk and certainly never drunk until he was passed out underneath a table.

The bartender gave her a relieved sigh when he saw that she was here to pick him up. Right, so she was supposed to pick him up? He was nearly 200 lbs and she was barely 100. Yes, right, easy peasy.

She knelt by his head and trying to not smell the alcohol fumes coming from him, tapped his cheek and he snorted for a second but then snored away again. So the light tapping turned into a slap which only made his face pull into an expression of a frown and then smoothed out into a relaxed sleep once again.

Nanao let out an aggravated sigh and looked around just to stop at his twin zanpakutou still strapped to his waist and an idea popped into her head. It wasn't a particularly smart idea since it would hurt her a bit too but it was an effective one.

So she took a deep breath for courage and reached for the bigger of his katana. When she grasped the hilt, for a second nothing happened but soon enough she received a painful electric shock that ran all the way through her body from his angry zanpakutou.

Katen Kyoukatsu wasn't too pleased with anybody else but Shunsui handling it, but the same painful jolt that ran through her also went through Shunsui by default since she was touching his chest and he came awake with a jerk.

"Ah, damn, what the hell!" He groused not sounding too slurred or anything.

Nanao just looked at him and then put the form in front of his face.

"Sign here, taicho, now!"

Shunsui looked around the bar and contemplated his current position, trying to assimilate all the information. With a shake of his head he tried to clear it and Nanao winced, you shouldn't shake your head if you were hung-over but Shunsui didn't even blink and it somehow seemed to make him more awake since he now stared at her intently, if still somewhat drunk.

"Nanao-chan?! What are you doing here?" He asked bewildered.

"I was looking all over for you, taicho, since you forgot to sign the 13A form I laid out on your desk this morning with various reminders all over the office!."

Shunsui looked over at the form and rolled his eyes as if saying, you should know better by now. Which just infuriated Nanao.

She took out a pen pressed it into his hand and poised it on the line where the signature was supposed to be.

"I would have forged it but they put these particular forms under reiatsu testing which is why you actually have to do it yourself." Nanao had started to forge his signatures long ago and Shunsui just let her do it, often smiling over "his ingenious Nanao-chan" who knew him so well.

With a sigh, Kyouraku-taicho scrawled his signature askew over the line and Nanao breathed a sigh of relief. Yes! And still three hours to spare.

"What time is it?" Her taicho asked tiredly.

"It is exactly 3 o'clock in the morning, sir!"

"Oh, you said that as if it's a good thing, Nanao-chan." Nanao didn't even bother to correct him, he was drunk and she was saved. She was happy.

Shunsui looked over his body and saw his slightly pulled sword and with a frown re-sheathed it again, just to hiss as if it burned him.

He looked up at her then with a not amused smile.

"Katen Kyoukatsu wants me to tell you to not touch it if not invited."

Nanao looked a bit peeved at that but soon got over it and looked her taicho in the eye.

"Sorry, but I didn't know how else to get you out of your stupor."

Shunsui nodded as if he understood her dilemma and wasn't resentful. Good.

With a sigh he tried to get up but his legs wouldn't cooperate.

Nanao couldn't look at him without wincing and since she was a good fukutaicho, went over to him, put his arm over her shoulders to stabilise him and helped him walk in the direction of the door.

"I will take you home, taicho."

He just nodded absently and concentrated on putting one foot in front of the other.

Once they were outside he looked up and his body got heavier for a second before he found his balance again and started rambling,

"Look what a beautiful moon it is tonight, Nanao-chan, it's not the full moon yet but it still looks magnificent doesn't it?" But he didn't really wait for an answer since he continued talking without a pause, "Everything just looks magical and… also a bit sad, don't you think? Bathed in night and only illuminated by the moon everything looks beautiful but very dark at the same time. That's the two coin thing I guess. Something can be good and bad in the same instance, sad and happy, pleasure and pain, you can't really have the one without the other, but it makes sense, doesn't it? If there was no pain, we wouldn't appreciate happiness because we wouldn't be able to compare it to anything and think that's just normal but with pain and sorrow in the equation, happiness means a lot." Then he fell silent.

Nanao didn't know what to think and just looked up at him to see that he was still looking at the moon until he stumbled and nearly took them both down.

He was clearly drunk, his glassy eyes and strange behaviour were a clear indication and his rambled philosophical thoughts? Very melancholy; and for a second Nanao wanted to know why he was thinking about pain and sorrow on a night like this, because he must have, to end up drunk under a table. Clearly, he had continued his thoughts from before he had fallen unconscious.

Whatever the reason, he fell silent and stayed that way until they stood in front of his door, not moving.

"Taicho?"

"Hmm?"

"Where is your key?"

Shunsui looked perplexed, "Key?"

"Yes, the key with which you open your door…"

Shunsui frowned as if deep in thought then smiled and just slid the door open.

"I never lock it. I can sense whoever was in here and really, nobody is stupid enough to steal anything from me." And he smiled, happy with his explanation.

Nanao just looked at him as if she though he was weird but then just let it go and sighed.

"Then I'll leave you to yourself", but as soon as she stepped out from under him, he lurched and nearly fell if she hadn't moved fast enough to keep him upright.

Her captain _giggled_, actually giggled, "Oops."

Nanao didn't know if he was serious but it seemed as if he got drunker again by the minute after his bout of a little more sobriety through the jolt from Katen Kyoukatsu. She had half a mind to do it again to get him sobered up enough again.

It seemed as if it was Nanao's job to get her superior unharmed to sleep. Really, the man was a dork. So Nanao helped him through his cozy house. She had been in here before and always got a very homey and comfy feeling when she was inside. It wasn't well designed or anything but it was just so her taicho. Books and scrolls thrown haphazardly around the living room which she could see from the entry hall and a smell of sake, man and strangely enough, Nanao sniffed again, sandalwood? Tasteful paintings that were pleasing to the eye lined his walls and let know that he had an artistic core.

But without any detours Nanao took her taicho to his bedroom which was upstairs and it wasn't particularly easy to manoeuvre the big lug upstairs. But Nanao wouldn't be his fukutaicho if she couldn't manage her taicho.

Heaving and panting Nanao eventually nearly carried the man into his lavish bedroom. There just was nothing Spartan about the man least of all his bedroom with the decadent paintings of lovers entwined. The paintings were beautiful, Nanao had to admit, since they were wonderfully drawn and sensual to the eye instead of gaudy and cheap looking. The big and heavy wooden bed made a statement in the room and made the room sinful to look at. There was really no other furniture in the room except for the bed, two nightstands, a heavy intricately carved chest at the foot of the bed and a wall of wardrobes.

Throwing him onto his bed, Nanao misjudged that her captain was still hanging onto her and hadn't released her which resulted in him pulling her onto the bed too, on top of him to be correct. Quickly, Nanao tried to wiggle her way off his chest but she only managed to get upright and straddle him.

Shunsui while having been more asleep than awake now perked up a bit and took a hold of her hips to steady her. When Nanao looked down at him, she started when she saw his half-lidded gaze locked fully with hers. Nanao didn't know what to think of that. But she was blushing nonetheless at the position they were in. She couldn't deny that her taicho was a good-looking man, it had been pointed out to her by other female Shinigami too many times for her to not notice but she had always known that he regarded her as his charge or something and when he flirted with her Nanao didn't feel as if there was any intent, at least no romantic intent, behind it, he just wanted to rile her a bit.

But his eyes certainly didn't give her that impression now especially since she could feel the other evidence of his arousal pressing between her legs. His eyes glowed and made her feel hot. Before she could jerk back, and Nanao told herself afterwards she had had every intention of pulling back, yeah right, Shunsui started speaking.

"You know, Nanao, you've turned into quite a beautiful woman."

And with that he sat up, pulled her head towards himself and kissed her passionately.

Nanao didn't quite comprehend what was happening. She just knew that her taicho was kissing her. Her! Her mind whirled but the smell of sake on his breath intruded and she knew that he was drunk. She should pull back, she really should - he didn't know what he as doing.

But before _she_ could act, Shunsui did and pulled her underneath him in one roll to lie atop her while pulling her legs apart and sinking in between them until Nanao gasped into his mouth. The only thing that separated them were their uniforms but even those didn't stand a chance of numbing the sensations since he was pressing into her so hard.

Nanao could feel every delicious inch of his body pressing into hers and she felt so unbelievably good that any thought of stopping him she might have harboured instantly got wiped away and she was pulled under the sensations he evoked from her.

Lazy kisses were pressed to her face, down her neck a slide of tongue and a nibble on her collarbone, just to stop where her uniform started. With nimble and experienced fingers he opened the sash of her uniform with one hand and spread it wide to bare her upper body, still covered by her breast bindings. He simply rolled those down and then dived in to feast on her breasts. Kissing, licking and biting at her perky nipples until Nanao moaned in abandon. Nanao's hands were not idle however and she divested him of his two haori until she had to stop since she couldn't get the upper part of his uniform off him.

"Off, take it off." She moaned into him.

And Shunsui thought, who was he to not oblige the beautiful woman in his bed and quickly got rid of his whole uniform until he sank onto her naked. Nanao groaned at his delicious weight and angled her legs around his hips, pulling him in deeper which made him groan. Shunsui knew he was forgetting something important here but at the moment he just couldn't stop to think. Her smell and her soft skin were a haven he wouldn't give up, couldn't to be honest.

Quickly Shunsui set out to get rid of the last barrier between them, the trouser part of her uniform, and slid it down her legs erotically. When that was done he looked down at the bared goddess and leaned over her to partake of her divinity. With lazy, poignant strokes of his tongue in between her thighs he brought her to an explosive peak, that made her eyes widen and her thighs quiver.

Shunsui reared over her and spread her legs to slide between them, not stopping his forward motion until his cock was buried to the hilt in her sheath. Nanao gave a small cry beneath him, but her glassy passion-filled eyes put his mind to rest that she was enjoying herself. They found a rhythm instantly and harsh breaths emanated from them both at the glorious feelings until with a turbulent stroke he made them both come explosively.

Nanao was trying to catch her breath when she felt him pull out of her and she didn't want to analyse the feeling of loss she experienced when he pulled back, but she didn't have to worry since he just turned her over to let a hand glide down her spine in a luscious gesture that had her shivering. He stopped on her left ass cheek where he found the little tattoo of a single cherry blossom and bent down to kiss and lick it. When he bit into her flesh delicately, Nanao was ready to buck.

"I need you, please, come to me."

And without words he lowered himself onto her back and slid into her sheath anew. The new angle made the feelings sharper, tighter, more intense and Nanao was pretty much groaning instead of breathing by then. When she came, she came long and hard and Shunsui followed her.

Her taicho was breathing hard against her neck, making goose bumps break out across her sensitized flesh. With a lick along her spin, Shunsui pulled out of her and let his hands slide down her body with gentle slides. Stopping again at her little black tattoo that seemed to be intriguing him quite a bit. He chuckled into her ass check and massaged her thighs that had started to tremble gently. God, the man was truly good at this. With a heavy sigh he leaned down against her back, pulled her back against him and then he was off in a drunken sleep that he was sure not to recover from for a long while. With a shudder, darkness also took her.

*****

Nanao woke to the sensation of someone spooning her back. With a rush she remembered everything that had happened with her taicho, who currently had one hand right over her breast. She gasped and looked back just to see him still heavily asleep; his relaxed body a beautiful sight.

She looked around and saw the soft glimmer of approaching dawn creep into the room and wondered what had woken her up even before sunrise. She saw a clock on the nightstand that read quarter to six and at the thought of six, her paperwork sprang back into her mind, she had exactly another 15 minutes to hand it in.

In a rush now, Nanao sprang up from Shunsui's arms and got dressed in a hurry, pulling this way and that and tying that and stuffing this. She looked back to the bed just to see her taicho still snoring happily away. With a sigh she turned with the form in hand and shunpoed so fast, faster than she had ever shunpoed to the 1st Division and made it! In one piece and on time.

After that she went straight to the office, not bothering to go home since she could have a shower in her Division training bathrooms and she wouldn't be able to sleep for that one hour anyway if she went home now.

However, the quiet time in the office and the shower gave her plenty enough time to think straight for a bit. Cool headed, practical Nanao had done the unthinkable. She had had sex with her superior. She couldn't deny that it had been one of the single most amazing experiences of her life and considering he had been pretty drunk she couldn't even imagine what it would be like if he wasn't-NO, with a resolute shake of her head she refused to think of a repeat. Having sex once was one thing but thinking of doing it more often? That just screamed for trouble. It would be hard enough to work together now, she sighed and went to work, somehow dreading and at the same time wanting his arrival.

Nanao had to wait quite a while for Shunsui to come in because it was way in the afternoon when he graced the office with his hung-over presence.

She didn't know how to behave at all and was at a loss, so she guessed her expression had to be quite comical when she greeted him but he didn't even blink and tried to smile, failing miserably.

"Morning, Nanao-chan, anything happen?" His voice sounded gruff and hoarse and he wasn't even looking at her.

So Nanao tried to play it cool and looked back down to continued to write her daily paperwork.

"No, Kyouraku-taicho, everything is in perfect order."

"Ah, good. Nanao-chan?" He had a serious note in his tone, oh god, would he say something about last night?

"Yes, taicho?"

"I think, well, I know I had too much to drink last night since I can't remember a thing, much less how I managed to drag myself home, but have you been at my house?"

Nanao was stock still and the pen nearly broke in her fierce grip. What the hell?! Had he forgotten the most amazing night of her life? Giving her orgasms and so much pleasure she thought she would die from it…and he couldn't remember?!

Nanao forced a professional smile and looked up, "Yes, taicho, I brought you home. I was looking for you to sign something and found you in a bar and didn't think you would manage to get home on your own so I helped you out, why?

Would something now trigger his memory? Was that how it worked?

"Oh, thank you Nanao-chan," he smiled and she could hear the gladness in his voice, "Gods, I have a total black-out. I felt your reiatsu lingering in my house and since I can't really remember the last time you visited, I thought it must have been recent."

Nanao was still composing herself, "Oh, yes, I see."

Shunsui nodded and then winced, grabbing his forehead as if to keep his brain from spilling out.

"Thank you, Nanao-chan."

But somehow the Nanao-chan didn't sound right anymore. It sounded like an uncle or a father addressing a child and she was neither to him. Remembering what he had done to her during the night, Nanao-chan seemed so wrong on so many levels now, especially since he couldn't remember what they had done.

"I'm just gonna head over to Ukitake for a bit, alright? He has this amazing tea that cures even the worst of hang-over, so maybe it'll take the edge off my headache," and with a self-deprecating smile Shunsui vanished out the door to leave Nanao alone in her office with very conflicting emotions.

It was for the best that he couldn't remember, no awkwardness, no second guessing, so why the hell did it hurt so damn much?

_Flashback__ End_

**~o~S~o~**

And that was how it had happened, their one night of pleasure, which he couldn't even remember and it still hurt as much as it had then, Nanao admitted to herself in the loneliness of her thoughts. No other man had been on her radar since and she couldn't see anything happening in the near future either.

She sank deeper into her bath tub and strangely enough, tears threatened to spill over but she refused to let them fall. So what, she had never been good with relationships anyway so why the hell would she have the audacity to think that her luck would turn at any point soon, especially since she didn't know what she wanted to begin with.

* * *

_**A/N:**__ First of all, thanks to all the lovely reviewers, I hope I didn't forget to reply to anyone. As for those that don't have accounts:_

_JapanLi: No problem ;) I'm glad you enjoyed yourself!_

_InThisLife: lol. See, here, updated XD_

_Apachesunrise254: thanks so much for pointing it out. I hadn't even been conscious of doing it! I hope I wasn't as trigger-happy with the italics in this one ;)_

_BTW -__ I got their weights off the internet I think from the bleachwiki. So they're not my invention, because seriously, I've got a friend that barely weighs a hundred pounds and she's TINY, so I can't imagine what Nanao would look in real life._

_Anyways, I hope the update was fast enough, and that you enjoyed it!_


	3. Games

**Chapter 3:**** Games**

"_Life's a game, all you have to do, is know how to play it."_

~Anonymous

* * *

During the next week, Nanao made a new resolution. She wouldn't cry after something she had no business wanting in the first place and so she became a veritable "goer". Going out each night after work with different friends to try and enjoying herself. The weird part was - she really did! It wasn't as if Nanao was boring or anything, she liked going out with her close friends, usually in moderation, though.

But this week she left all her inhibitions and thoughts at the door to her office and had fun with her fellow fukutaicho. Actually, you couldn't _not_ have fun with that bunch that included Shinigami like Matsumoto Rangiku, one of the funniest people ever, especially if tanked, and Kira Izuru, who wasn't really that funny but it was decidedly fun seeing all his sad antics.

In short, she had a good time.

It was Friday night and the bars were even more stuffed than they had been during the week, and while slightly oppressive, it felt nice to hear the carousing and fun of other groupings around her.

"Ey, ey, I need a new drink!" Abarai Renji tried to shout to one of the waiters who apparently couldn't hear him above the noise level of the bar.

"Damn it! Do I have to get up now?!" Renji looked so put out that Nanao chuckled and got up herself.

"I'll go to the bar, anybody else want something?" Nanao asked. After affirmatives of every occupant of the table, Nanao made her way over to the bar and ordered her drinks after gaining the attention of the busy bartender.

While waiting for her drinks, Nanao could feel eyes on her but couldn't pinpoint the location that the feeling originated from and a quick look around didn't give her any clues either.

She shrugged her shoulders. Usually she would have been bothered more but the few drinks she had had did their job fabulously she thought with a lopsided grin.

"Hey there Miss fukutaicho." A voice came from her right. Nanao looked up and saw a tall, quite handsome Shinigami with a nice smile looking down to her.

A quick run through her brain gave her the answer that he wasn't in the 8th Division.

She smiled back politely.

"Oh, no, you can't just smile back like _that_, you're supposed to look as if the sun just rose after a long night." The words were completely arrogant but his tone of voice was charming and fun.

Nanao smiled a bit less politely and more honestly.

"Better but still not quite what I had in mind - but we are getting there." He said with twinkling eyes.

"Aoki Eiro." He extended his hand for her to shake and Nanao not thinking put hers into his. Instead of shaking her hand, he lifted it to his mouth, though, and kissed the back of it gently. Nanao chuckled and looked the Shinigami over. Well, well, well. He was the proverbial tall, dark and handsome and he was charismatic, no doubt about that but with a pang she thought of her taicho and his antics and had to think of a time when her taicho had probably started out like this too, before he became legendary.

But Nanao didn't want to think of her taicho at the moment, she was trying to enjoy herself and who better to help her than a handsome man who was interested in her. If she wasn't as interested in him as she played at, well, she certainly wouldn't tell and so flirted right back at the charmer.

**~o~S~o~**

Shunsui was sitting in a corner a bit shielded from the other clients of the bar next to Ukitake. This particular bar didn't have a separate backroom but they certainly had a nice secluded corner where one could see everything but at the same time couldn't be seen. Being a taicho was, in certain instances, like when you wanted to relax a bit at a bar on a Friday night, a bit of a bother (not that he had done all that much during the week) since you got starry-eyed kids trying to get in your good graces and women trying to get into your bed.

He snorted at the cynical thought. He wasn't drunk enough yet.

Ukitake next to him certainly was well on his way to being tanked and was flirting with a pretty Shinigami with his usual gentle charm that usually wrapped the pretty females around his little finger. The elicited blushing giggles were testament to Ukitake's suave ways with women.

Shunsui sighed and looked around the bar just to stop with a real smile at the form of his Nanao-chan who was going to the bar. It was good to see that she got out once in a while with her friends.

He watched her make her way to the bar and then lean over to get the attention of the bartender and deposit her order. She must have felt his eyes on her because she looked around with a frown but his corner was hidden well enough that she didn't see him and so went back to waiting, until some Shinigami pup came up to her and probably started flirting since soon enough a pretty smile came onto her face.

Shunsui frowned. And then frowned some more. Why was he frowning? He looked over at the pair and the frown didn't abate. He didn't know the Shinigami who was talking to his Nanao-chan but he could already tell that the boy wasn't good enough by far for his Nanao-chan. Wasn't smart enough and by the gods wasn't strong enough to protect her.

He saw the Shinigami lean into Nanao and whisper something in her ear that made Nanao look up and stare into his eyes intensely and after a few torturous moments she shook her head and the guy leaned down and…_kissed_ her! Right there and then in the bar and Shunsui had to use all his formidable willpower and restraint to keep his reiatsu from blasting the whole bar into oblivion.

What the hell! What was that little pup doing?! Shoving his tongue down her throat…and touching her! The soon to be _permanently_ dead Shinigami had one of his hands low, very low on her back, nearly on her ass. The gall!

Shunsui was using every tactic he had ever been taught to stay in control of his emotions.

Why the hell was he so furious? Because someone was kissing Nanao-chan? Kissing someone who was his? His?! He frowned again at that and was able to relax a bit, although he was still watching the two with hawks' eyes, even though it hurt a bit to watch them.

However, soon enough the guy pulled back and although he was too far away to hear anything, he could see the guy saying something to Nanao-chan and Nanao-chan answered something back with a small smile on her face.

Had they made plans for something more later on? If those two were to leave the bar together, Shunsui couldn't be held accountable for what he did to the boy. When Nanao moved, every muscle was tense in his body. But… the boy didn't move. He looked after Nanao as she made her way to her table with the orders collected from the bartender but … the boy _didn't_ follow and soon enough he turned away and vanished into the press of people.

Shunsui breathed a sigh of relief and relaxed back into the cushion drinking down a cup of sake in one swallow.

**~o~S~o~**

The next day in the office Nanao was concentrated as ever. The last night had actually been kind of fun, she had to admit. Her fellow fukutaicho were all a hoot and even though the little kissing session with the handsome Aoki Eiro hadn't worked out for either of them, she was proud of herself for being spontaneous and not wallowing in self-pity over her taicho.

Yesterday had shown her that maybe, even though she had felt absolutely nothing when Eiro had kissed her, it had shown her that maybe if she looked well enough she could find someone who could replace Shunsui's memory from her mind. Doubtful but a possibility.

But as soon as her taicho entered the office just before lunch and she got her first eyeful of him she admitted it was probably futile since her heart instantly started a hard pitter-patter rhythm and her thighs clenched in reaction to the tiny little spasms that were happening in between them.

"Morning, Kyouraku-taicho."

"Good morning, Nanao-chan." Shunsui smiled at her but she frowned when she saw that it was a bit strained. Nanao thought that maybe he had a hangover or something, wouldn't be the first time, and decided to go back to work.

Even though it was silent, which wasn't unusual, Nanao's whole body was strung tight and something was decidedly not right! The tension in the room was so thick you could have probably cut it with a dull knife and Nanao had absolutely no idea why.

"Taicho?" She decided to be active.

"Yes, Nanao-chan?" He looked over at her from his seemingly relaxed pose on the lounge, a book in hand.

"Is everything alright?" She ventured.

Her taicho looked over at her broodingly and then sighed and went back to his book.

"Of course, Nanao-chan. Everything is just perfect." He said, not looking at her.

Nanao looked at him for a second longer and frowned heavily at him. No teasing, no exaggerations, no nothing. Odd. Maybe he really did have a hangover. Nanao sighed and went back to work, not seeing her taicho's inscrutable glance at her.

**~o~S~o~**

Nanao didn't know what to do anymore. She loved the man. She really did and he was completely oblivious. While she was usually very direct in everything she did. Being direct in things of the heart was not her forte.

She looked glumly across the bar to where her obviously tipsy taicho lounged with a woman in each arm, each trying to crawl into his lap.

Nanao made a disgusted sound and drank down her wine in a gulp.

"Nanao! You can't drink that like it's some cheap hooch. This is absolutely divine wine to be savoured - not gulped down!" Rangiku leaned over the table, nearly spilling her breasts out of her uniform in the process.

"Now, look what you made me do." And she rearranged her chest so her uniform fit her once again. Barely.

"What is up with you anyway? You're a spoilsport tonight, all glum and dark. The last few days have been so much fun with you. What's wrong now?" Rangiku, too observant for her own good looked frowningly over at her and then she looked in the direction that Nanao had stared at all the time and saw the reason why Nanao was so depressed.

"Ah, he's got some floozies hanging on his arms, huh?"

Nanao looked away guiltily.

"I don't know what is going on with you two but Nanao, I think it's about time you told me."

And maybe it was the wine, or the compassionate expression on Rangiku's face that made her want to talk. She had never confided in anyone about her one night with her taicho and it was eating at her. While Rangiku wasn't too successful with her relationships either, the woman knew what she wanted and at least went after it. Most of the time.

"Not here." Nanao said swiftly and before she could blink, Rangiku had dragged her out of the bar and half-way back to her quarter. She guessed she really _was_ kinda sloshed.

Soon enough they arrived at Rangiku's quarters in the 10th Division area and Rangiku shoved her into the small apartment before she stepped into it herself and closed the door. She switched on some lights and deposited them both on the couch.

"Alright, and now spill!" She looked at Nanao expectantly.

"God, Rangiku, do you never clean in here?" Nanao was astonished at the chaos. Clothes and magazines lying around, a mug strewn in between here and there. And… take-out cartons. Uh oh.

"Pah, Nanao, you know me. I've got more important things to do than clean. And I don't have enough money to hire a cleaner." Rangiku said snappishly, not saying anything to Nanao who had started to put the magazines into neat piles.

"Yes, because apparently you spend it all on clothes and magazines." Nanao said, looking around.

"Ah, Nanao don't stall! Just tell me. It can't be so bad."

Nanao didn't think. Couldn't, and literally just spilled it all.

"It's worse…I had sex with Kyouraku-taicho about ten years ago which he can't remember. I am in love with the man and he sees me as a daughter or a sister." Nanao looked at Rangiku's absolutely shocked face with just a bit of satisfaction. Take that!

"Oh my goodness! Seriously? Don't pull my leg about this, you hear me, Nanao?"

"I'm serious, unfortunately." Nanao admitted with a heavy heart.

"Oh my. Oh wow!" And then Matsumoto Rangiku was silent for a long while, a feat in itself.

"And you're in love with him?" Rangiku asked aghast.

"Yes." Nanao didn't want to beat around the bush. She had done so long enough and if someone could help her out of this hopeless situation it was one Matsumoto Rangiku, even if she hadn't rally admitted to herself to finally wanting to find a solution to her dilemma.

"And he can't remember at all?" Rangiku asked doubtfully.

"No not at all." And Nanao told her all that had happened, leaving out some of the more juicy details.

"Wow, I mean I like the man but at the moment I think I'd clop him a painful one over the head. Damn!"

Then they were silent for a while. Nanao was trying not to vomit after her confession and the alcohol she had imbibed on while Rangiku digested the whole story, gods, Rangiku couldn't believe that her friend had kept that secret form her for over ten years!

"So, what to you plan to do?" Rangiku asked after a while.

"Well, that's exactly my problem; I have absolutely no idea what to do. I love the man and while he flirts and teases me constantly, it's harmless and he doesn't mean it! He practically raised me and he doesn't see me in a sexual way." Nanao ended unhappily.

"I can see your problem but why don't you try to seduce the man. Tease _him_! Make _his_ heart beat faster for a change."

Nanao looked doubtfully at her friend.

"How?"

Rangiku got an evil smile that would have made Aizen Sousuke shudder and Nanao leaned forward in glee.

"Now, listen my pupil, what you have to do, is simply…"

**~o~S~o~**

The next day at the office, Nanao was unbelievably excited. She now had a plan. It wasn't the best but she could now do battle. Battle her own taicho if she had to!

When he came in after lunch with a yawn on his face, her excitement abated a bit. What had he done that he was still tired when he was coming in _after_ lunch? The two floozies in his arms popped into her mind and she tried to suppress the pain and put all the sad energy into her plan. If it worked, he would never so much as look at another woman, or man for that matter (she knew her taicho!) again.

"Hello, my beautiful Nanao-chan!" He gave her a tired smile.

"Kyouraku-taicho." Nanao answered respectfully.

"I hope there isn't much to do today, I'd like to call it an early night, or afternoon, for that matter." And he chuckled.

Nanao gave him a frown.

"Don't look at me like that, Nanao-chan." Her taicho whined.

Nanao sighed and shook her head at his antics, "No taicho, there is not a lot to do for _you_ today, just a few signatures."

Shunsui gave a happy sigh and plopped into his chair, a pen poised, ready to sign. Nanao nearly rolled her eyes at the sight, she _had_ trained him well.

After ascending to the position of fukutaicho, she had soon found out that it was absolutely fruitless to let her taicho do any paperwork at all. He doodled, wrote down memos to himself and drew little sketches for some future paintings since he was a very gifted artist, when the mood struck him. Nanao blushed just thinking of his favoured topic. Erotica. Men and woman, separately or together, nearly all in the nude, he just loved the forms of men and women.

After those instances, she had taken over to do his share of the paperwork too. After a while, when he had found out Nanao was doing his paperwork for him, there had been a time when he had completely stopped coming to the office, thinking that now he had nothing else to do. Nanao hadn't minded that much and then had started to forge his signatures on some forms, not knowing that some of the forms were put under reiatsu testing scrutiny.

When she had been ordered to the first, her taicho had suddenly been there and had put his head on the chopping block for Yamamoto-soutaicho, so to speak.

After that, Nanao had invented a new model of doing paperwork. While she still did his forms, he signed them. That he put that much trust in her that he signed stuff without even reading what the form entailed boosted her confidence every single time.

Coming back to the present, Nanao arranged the forms and stood up, feeling a bit queasy but she was not a coward, so she went over to his desk and put one form in front of him, holding onto the rest.

"Sign here please taicho." And she leaned over his shoulder so that her specially unbound breasts grazed his shoulder when she pointed at the line for his signature.

At first Nanao thought he hadn't noticed at all but after she had done it about four times he looked back from the corner of his eyes and looked at her, then a quick glance at her breasts. Nanao pretended to be busy with rearranging or looking for something in the forms but she knew where his eyes had strayed to.

She took a deep breath and felt her unbound breasts rise with the motion. Then after a passable amount of time, she made a happy noise as if she had found what she had been looking for and then leaned over him again and put down some more forms. But before she grazed his shoulder again, Shunsui had jumped up fast to evade her.

"Taicho?" Nanao asked, blinking innocently. Gods, she could have been an amazing actress.

"Eh, Nanao-chan, I-I'll be going to Ukitake, yes, that's it, I forgot, he needed me for, for rearranging his living room! Yes, that's it! Bye."

And gone he was.

Nanao waited a few moments until she let a devilish smile flit across her face.

"Let the games begin."

* * *

_A/N: So here it is! Told you, I'd update on the weekend. Revision for my exams is kicking my ass so I took some time off and distracted myself with this chapter. __The next one should be up by the end of next week – look for a Friday update *Crosses fingers that she can keep to the deadline*._

_Anyways, let me know what you thought of the new chapter. I love reading your reviews, comments etc. And I hope I make that clear in my replies! For those who I couldn't reply to privately, here a few comments…_

_**pearlyn**__ – thanks fort he review! I'm glad you're enjoying it. Hope you also enjoyed the new chapter _

_**InThisLife,**__ - Aww, that's great! I hope you continue to love it ;-)_

_**JapanLi**__ – Well, I'm glad the storyline is believable. I always try to make them as in character as I possibly can, even if they are in situations like this. I hope this chapter didn't disappoint!_


	4. Painting

**Chapter 4:**** Painting**

"_Each painting has its own way of evolving...When the paint__ing is finished, the subject reveals itself."_

~WilliamBaziotes

* * *

This seducing business was actually harder than anticipated, Nanao thought, especially if your quarry was a taicho and could out-_shunpo_ you and on top of that, had more hidey holes than Nanao had ever thought possible.

But on the upside, she was definitely getting to him, Nanao thought with a self-satisfied smile. He was wary of her and had ceased his teasing completely, which was weird to say the least. She was actually very surprised since she didn't have to do a lot to get him flustered either, just a little touch on his wrist or a little glide along his body with hers – well it wasn't her fault if her unbound breasts were touching him, now was it?

She had taken to leaving them without any binding. In the beginning, it had felt weird and uncomfortable and…jiggly… but as soon as her taicho really saw her unbound and therefore bigger breasts without the flattening obstruction, it had all been worth it.

He had walked into their shared office as usual the day after his quick departure, and he hadn't really noticed anything while she was still sitting behind her desk. But as soon as she got up, just to open the window and let in some fresh air, she had felt his _reiatsu_ crackle violently for just a millisecond before he had gotten it back under control. So when she turned back to her desk, her taicho was staring at everything except her, of course he had made a swift departure afterwards mumbling something about Ukitake that Nanao couldn't hear above her inner gloating.

Also, she tried to make eye contact as often as possible. Even if she couldn't do any lascivious gazes à la Matsumoto Rangiku, he must have been able to see something in her eyes that made him scared or at least uncomfortable because he had started avoiding eye contact when he was usually one of the few persons who never had any problems looking her in the eye.

Nanao didn't want him to feel uncomfortable but if she was one thing, it was tenacious. She wouldn't stop until she had seen this through, for better or for worse.

It had been Rangiku's idea after having seen her kiss Aoki Eiro in the bar, to try to use a bit of jealousy to get a reaction from her taicho, despite Nanao's protestations that her taicho was too laid back to have such a childish emotion. But with a knowing smile, Rangiku had imparted the knowledge that if he wasn't even a tad bit jealous, then there probably was no hope.

Nanao didn't like this part of The Plan but after hunting down and contacting Eiro-san and talking to him, she had been surprised at what a talkative, smart and great guy he was. If not for her being spoiled for other men, he would probably be a lucky catch.

"So, basically you want me to help you get one of the most powerful taichos in the Gotei13 jealous?" He said dryly.

"Eiro-san, I know this does not sound very intelligent but a friend gave me the advice and frankly I do not know what else to do." Nanao said succinctly.

"Alright, I'm in. But only because this is the most interesting thing I've heard of in a long while. And just to be clear," he said with a devilish smile, "if I end up in the 4th because of this, you will come every day and bring me chocolate."

"What is it with you and your particular fondness for chocolate? Is it not supposed to be the woman who is enamoured with the sweets?"

"Ah, my pretty fukutaicho, chocolate is a divine gift that has many, many uses." Eiro stated, smiling innocently.

Nanao didn't know what he meant exactly, but she blushed a bit nonetheless.

The next day, as was pretty usual, her taicho came into the office at just after lunch. He lounged on the couch with a book in hand, commenting on the nice sunny weather on a sigh. It was a pleasure to watch her taicho just be his usual self again. With a smidge of sadness, she was sure that what was about to happen wouldn't get a reaction out of him.

"Taicho?", she got his attention, "may I leave earlier today? I know it is not proper conduct but I have finished my paperwork."

Her taicho smiled indulgently, "Of course, Nanao-chan. Enjoy the sun. Does that mean there is no work for me today either?" He asked hopefully.

"So it would seem, sir."

With a knock, both were cut short.

"Enter." Nanao said, hoping that her taicho couldn't hear the trembling in her voice.

"Ah, Nanao-san, I hope I'm not too early."

Was that a flash of reiatsu from her taicho? Why? He didn't know Eiro and why he was here, did he? Quickly composing herself, she answered,

"Oh no, I was just finishing up. Oh, taicho, this is Aoki Eiro, he is from the 7th Division."

"It's an honour to meet you, sir." Eiro said honestly and respectfully with a slight bow to his head.

"Ah, yes, likewise."

Nanao didn't know how to interpret the tone of voice or the guarded expression on her taicho's face.

"We were just about to head out for an afternoon pick-nick, have a good day, sir." Nanao said her goodbyes.

"What-" but her taicho caught himself. Nanao's heart was beating so fast she was sure all the occupants could hear it.

Her taicho had gotten up and was staring at her…accusingly? He was a towering figure to be certain and Nanao was once again reminded of this, especially since she didn't want to play petty games of would-be jealousy. Especially not with her taicho. A more honest man, she had never met.

"Ah, I mean, are you sure, Nanao-chan? It is getting cold quite quickly now." He said with a sure frown. Was it actually working?!

"Taicho, it is September, and we have a beautiful Indian Summer with nice heat and sunshine. I am sure I will not be cold. And I've got Eiro-san with me." Was that a flinch?

For a moment, Nanao was sure her taicho was going to say more but then a smile came onto his face (was it wishful thinking that it seemed strained?) and swiftly he went for the door.

"Then I'm heading over to Ukitake's. Bye." And with a swish of his pink haori he was gone.

As soon as he had left, Nanao felt the oppressive feeling leave too with a sudden.

"Damn, he really was jealous." Eiro said, with a frown after her taicho.

"What? Why do you say so?" Nanao inquired.

"Because I'm a man, I know such things." He said cryptically, with a frown on his face.

"What is the matter?"

"Ah, it's nothing, it's just that he's my hero, you know. I think I nearly cried when I didn't get into the 8th. I wanted to be a Shinigami just like him. Until today. Poor guy."

Before Nanao could ask him to elaborate on the last part, Eiro swiftly went to the door.

"Ah, so I survived without injuries but he's still jealous. I'm going to go on my holidays aka go into hiding for a few days, just in case anyways. It was nice having met you, Miss fukutaicho. And if the thing with him doesn't work out, do come and get me." He said with a last lascivious smile at her.

Nanao just chuckled and was even more determined to get her taicho than ever before. What good fortune it was, to be so well connected with the Shinigami Women's Association who was hosting a charity event soon that her taicho had promised to donate some paintings for.

**~o~S~o~**

Shunsui was wondering if he was in the wrong movie by now. Or it could be that all the alcohol had finally caught up with him and had rotted his brain. Because sure as hell, he had no idea what was going on.

It could always be the case that his little, diligent and studious fukutaicho had been exchanged by aliens or something because Nanao-chan had been decidedly … off.

Shunsui sighed, leaning back deeper into his couch, looking at the ceiling, contemplating the issue. Hmm… he had known the girl since she was no more than a slip of a child and she had always been a good Shinigami. And then an excellent fukutaicho. Always very reliable and consistent. So why was she acting so abnormal? What was going on?

First, there had been these strange feelings when he had seen her kissing that guy in the bar, making him uncomfortably aware that his little Nanao-chan, wasn't so little anymore. He had started to notice _Nanao_. Not that he hadn't noticed her before, but now he _noticed_ her. He had been uncomfortable enough with that revelation when Nanao had started…_flirting_ with him, for lack of a better word. No, scratch that, it _was_ flirting. He knew how it worked and she was flirting. He couldn't believe it, with him! And he didn't know what to think of it. Actually she was doing something more like seducing, he grumbled to himself.

So seeing the guy from the bar again, had been quite a shock. And for a second there he actually had been jealous. But he could read a situation like no other and especially in retrospect there was nothing in both their body languages that spoke of great familiarity or fondness. Which had assured him greatly. More than it should have. So why had she done that in front of him. To get a reaction from him?! It was all so confusing. First the flirting and now this.

When he had first noticed the flirting, lust had shot through him so hard and fast, he had been surprised he hadn't come instantly. His body had reacted so strongly to her that it had astonished himself. He was confident enough in who he was to not lie to himself about this. He had desired Nanao in that moment and that was when his guilt had set in just as hard as the lust just a few moments earlier had. He had always considered himself as something like her guardian and it would be too much like taking advantage of her, he believed if he actually said, much less did something about it.

Which was why he was currently steeling himself because in about ten minutes, his Nanao-chan would come to his door. It was his own fault, though. Why had he promised the Shinigami Women's Society some of his paintings for a charity auction again?

He knew already that this wasn't a good idea. Letting Nanao-chan be in such close quarters as himself with no Division members running around to chaperon them (or more like him) while his emotions were so conflicted and basically running amok inside him. He knew something would happen, it just had to; he could feel it in the very air he was breathing that nothing would be the same after today. And that was the scary part. Change.

With a knock at 6 pm sharp, which still surprised him despite her punctuality, Shunsui went over to his door and opened it with trepidation, watching his beautiful fukutaicho enter his home.

**~o****~S~o~**

Nanao didn't know what to think. Her taicho was decidedly off. He was jumpy and he was watching her with hawk's eyes. However, she tried to shrug it off and followed him into his house, which she had always liked with its light coming from big windows on all sides of the house and the knickknacks lying around all over, and with all his priceless paintings. Wandering around she admired them, some were his and some were masterpieces by other painters. They were all very different but had all a very erotic undertone to them. Nanao loved them. They were subtle, tasteful, and still so very sensual, all things she liked she had discovered after seeing them the first time with a critical eye.

"I'm really not too sure how many I can give you, Nanao-chan but just come into the back with me." He mumbled, pulling her out of her musings and he continued to amble through his house.

Nanao stayed silent and just followed him.

He arrived at a door and slid it open, stepping through, Nanao curiously hot on his heels. She had never seen this part of the house. When she stepped into the room, her curiosity was definitely piqued. It looked like an atelier, painting aisles and paintings were scattered around the room, which was completely flanked by windows on one side, floor to ceiling, giving a fabulous view out into a courtyard full of flowers and trees.

Nanao walked over and looked outside. It was such a pretty view. Flowers in every colour and shape were planted creatively and professionally along the garden walls.

"It is a beautiful view, right?" Shunsui looked over at her from a crouch, where he was looking through some paintings leaning against a wall.

"Yes, it is so lovely. I have never been in here." Nanao said, not moving away from the view.

Shunsui chuckled, "Usually, I don't really let anybody in here, it's distracting and… I don't know, it's just mine, you know?"

A smile tugged at Nanao's lips. Sometimes he was just such an artist.

"Ah, here I've got some that I can part with." Shunsui said, uncovering a whole staple of five or six canvasses in various sizes.

Nanao regretfully let her feet wander away from the view, over to where her taicho was and looked over his shoulder while he uncovered the paintings completely. And she had to admit once again that he was an extraordinary painter. The painting was of a woman, or at least of a woman's hipbones, all sensual lines and pretty angles, nothing more. Another was presumably of the same woman but this time it was a still of her lithe legs, cleverly shielding her mound, and another again of a hand, just a hand, but that alone seemed to radiate a sensual delight. The hand was delicate with pretty fingers topped by pretty nails and it made you call to mind all the pleasurable things that a hand could do.

"They're beautiful." Nanao whispered over his shoulder.

Shunsui looked back up at her and grinned. "You think so, Nanao-chan? Thanks, will they do? I don't think I can part with any others that aren't promised to someone." He said sheepishly.

"Which ones? Will you show me?" Nanao asked, wanting to see more of his beautiful art, totally forgetting about flirting with him, so in awe was she.

Shunsui looked up at her then and sighed but did as she asked and wandered over to another stack, right next to the front of windows.

He uncovered them slowly, gently, very gingerly. And Nanao was very curious now.

Shunsui uncovered them and laid the painting down on the floor, so the sun illuminated it to perfection. It was of a woman again; she was lying on her front, so you could see her whole back from head to toes perfectly. The lighting in the painting was a bit dark and blurred but it just added to the feel of the painting of the naked woman. Dark hair, not too long neither too short. The Slender lines of her back tapered into her flanks and her lithe legs with the ass as a beautiful transition. But by then the breath caught in her throat.

Right on the left ass check of the woman was a tattoo kept in black of a single sakura blossom. Nanao's breath constricted since she knew she had the exact same tattoo in the exact same position, it was pulsing on her ass cheek at the very moment. Knowing what she was looking for, she now recognized the lines of her own body!

She looked over at Shunsui with a sharp look but he was also perusing the painting. He couldn't know, could he? It was her!

Nanao tried to ask, since she couldn't _not_ ask, "When did you paint those, taicho?"

As if her voice had brought him from a far-away place he shook his head and looked at her for a moment, then…, "Hmm, when? Just a few years ago, I think. Ten years or so, why?"

"There is no date on them, so I wondered." Nanao said lamely, her throat tight.

Shunsui looked at the painting again.

"I don't know if it's finished, that's why there is no date."

"But it looks finished to me." Nanao answered gasping at the next uncovered painting of her, her ass cheeks with the tattoo in great detail. She blushed. Well, some unconscious part of him had obviously remembered their night together, it seemed, and his artistic side had transformed it into paintings.

Shunsui gauged her reaction and uncovered the last of the three, a painting of the front. Full frontal. She blushed at seeing her body on the painting fully displayed, her head was in shadows and a blurred but her body was in sharp detail, her swollen breasts with their rose tipped nipples, flushed from passion, her athletic tummy, her hip-bones and her slightly splayed legs so you could see just a hint of her pussy.

"Is my Nanao-chan shocked now?" Her taicho asked with a hint of laughter in his eyes.

She stared him straight into his eyes and it took all her courage to keep the connection and say bravely, "No, should I be?" Her taicho's face tightened, just a tic but he didn't say anything.

"So why are they not finished?" Nanao tried to get him back on track.

"They don't have names." He said simply.

"Names?" Nanao nearly squeaked. Names?

"Yes, usually you paint something and sometimes even before you make the first stroke of the brush, the painting will have a name, a title, a personality, if you will, but these don't, never happened to me before." He said, frowning just a bit and shaking his head.

Nanao was still in shock and even forgot to flirt with him, when she had thought that the erotic surroundings would be perfect to make him see her in a different light. But she couldn't get over the fact of seeing herself in some of his paintings, if he only knew…wait. Wait, wait, _wait_, if he only knew? He _could_ know! She could… Nanao trembled at the thought that came into her mind. It was a dangerous thought. Very dangerous. But…

"Who is the woman in the paintings, taicho?" Nanano asked slowly, knowing very well who it was.

"Hmm, that's the problem I think, Nanao-chan, I don't know. That's probably the reason why I can't name it, I think it was just a nice fantasy of mine. I can't see the woman's face so I think I just made her up and while usually that doesn't pose a problem, it seems it is one this time around." Shunsui ended and stood up.

Nanao stood across from him, the paintings between them and started doing something that was harder than anything she had done before. Courage, Nanao. Courage.

"You got the tattoo completely right." Nanao said slowly.

Shunsui looked at her uncomprehendingly, "Hmm?"

"You even got the one petal right that's just a bit bigger than the others, the tattoo artist got tired there a bit, you know." Nanao looked at the painting, not daring to look at him.

"What are you saying, Nanao-chan? Have you seen the tattoo before?"

"Have I seen it?" Nanao mumbled as if to herself and then chuckled wryly.

"Well, I guess you could say that." Nanao ended and looked up for just a moment just to see the frowning face of her superior.

Not wanting to drag it out for longer than she could stand, Nanao loosened the sash around her middle and turned her back to him, she couldn't see his reaction like this, which was good.

Her taicho started, "Nanao, what…" But his voice trailed off when the trousers part of her uniform slid to the floor and bared her ass cheeks to him, please gods, make him remember, was Nanao's only thought, the only thing she heard over her hard beating heart.

For a moment, there was complete silence. Not only were they both not talking but the whole moment seemed to stay stock-still, daring them to not even breathe.

And suddenly a gentle hand was at the small of her back, holding the upper part of her uniform, which was basically still in place, out of the way. Nanao nearly jumped away but made herself stand her ground. Her breathing came harsher than before, though.

The other of his hands made a path directly over her left ass cheek, palming the globe and letting his thumb slide over the sakura blossom tattoo.

"What-", he started but he had to collect his thoughts once again, "Nanao?" He just asked gasping, leaving, for once the –chan from her name and Nanao had to hold back a shiver.

Nanao turned around, Shunsui's hands slipping away from her ass, sliding down her legs before she was free of his touch and letting the upper part of her uniform fall into place so it covered her to the tops of her thighs. Nanao looked up into his face, which was pulled up into a severe frown.

"About ten years ago," Nanao started, "we had sex. You were drunk and obviously can't remember. I can and I guess after seeing those paintings which clearly depict _me_, I guess a small part of you does remember." Nanao said in her usual no-nonsense voice.

Shunsui looked as if she had slapped him, and she guessed in a way she had.

Thoughts run through Shunsui's head that were absolutely perplexed. This couldn't be true, could it? He couldn't have slept with Nanao! He couldn't have slept with her and not remembered, could he? His little Nanao-chan!

His formidable mind raced to wrap around this new knowledge. He looked at her body, her hakama, down at her ankles, trying to forget the image and the feel of his hand on the soft skin of her body. No chance, it was burned into his mind.

He just blinked at her and Nanao had to use every determined bone in her body to not move while he kept staring into her eyes.

"Nanao?!" He asked or demanded a bit helplessly.

"I found you in a bar," Nanao started to elaborate, "I needed a signature and found you really drunk and I brought you back to your house since I seriously doubted you could make it on your own and then when we were here I got you into your bedroom and one thing led to another. I had to get up really early to submit that blasted form and the next time I saw you again, in the office, you couldn't remember! "

Shunsui was literally speechless. This couldn't be happening! He looked at Nanao's serious face and knew she would never lie about something like this, though. He had no idea what to do now.

He looked at the drawings…of her?! This was Nanao?! With a rush the name for the paintings came to him, at long last, "Blurred Fantasies".

"This is you?" He asked again, not that he didn't believe her, but this was a very grave matter.

The look she sent him, said clearly "duh".

Shunsui looked from the painting to Nanao then back to the painting. It was very strange seeing her naked in front of him in the pictures when he didn't have a clear memory in his head of seeing her in that state.

Everything was just too much and he sat down heavily on the floor, looking unblinkingly at the biggest of the paintings, the one full frontal.

"Nanao, I- this is- …give me some time." He ended lamely, not knowing how to act, what to do, nothing, his mind was blank.

Without another word, Nanao took the paintings he had chosen for the SWA charity auction and left him to his thoughts.

**~o~S~o~**

Nanao's thoughts weren't that much more clam than Shunsui's though. She couldn't believe what she had done! This was _not_ happening!

She wandered around Seireitei aimlessly, not knowing where to go or what to do now. Her taicho had asked her to leave. Was that his answer? Or had he really been so shocked? Remembering his face, Nanao concluded he _had_ been so shocked!

The fresh air of the late afternoon was actually quite a bit crisp already, telling of the fall that would very soon arrive. Nanao took an encouraging, deep breath, hoping to cleanse her very soul with it.

She stopped at a remote batch of trees, knowing they were sakura trees even if she couldn't see the pink blossoms that would only be visible during the spring time. She looked around herself and with a start she could remember and afternoon when she had been very little, right after the vanishing of her mentor, Yadomaru Lisa. She had run all the way here, not knowing shunpo back then and had hidden, not wanting to hear the whispers in the Division about the absence of her mentor. Whispered lies like "traitor", she couldn't bear to hear anymore. She had sat right underneath this very tree for a whole afternoon, falling asleep due to all the mental stress she had been under during that time.

A gentle hand on her shoulder had woken her and she started into an upright position just to see pink all around her. It was her taicho! He just knelt there, looking at her kind of sadly. He had been so sad back then, too.

"You miss her, don't you?" He had asked in his deep voice that vibrated through her whole body.

"You miss her too." Little Nanao had said in a small voice.

Her taicho just sighed and looked away from her.

"Come on, little lady, let's get ourselves back, people were worried about you."

Nanao snorted at that, "No they weren't. They don't like me. They're all intimidated by the fact that I'm so small but smarter than all of them."

Shunsui chuckled lowly, "You've got a high opinion of yourself, don't you?"

Nanao looked away, she couldn't believe that she had been smart to her captain!

She bowed her head, "I apologize, taicho!"

"No! Please, don't! You were quite right, little Nanao-chan. What would you say then if I said, I was worried about you? It isn't like you to miss a kido class."

Nanao looked up from her bow with a start.

"Oh." She didn't know what else to say and it was then that she fell in love with her taicho, just a little.

"Now, come on! Back to the barracks it is for you, get strong and become my fukutaicho and you'll get your own room." He waggled his eyebrows funnily, insinuating it was the best thing ever. Which for Nanao at that point it would well be. She hated not having the space to be on her own at night.

Nanao looked up at her taicho and felt a strong determination take hold of her. His fukutaicho? That was Lisa's place, she had thought but…but it looked like as if Lisa was not coming back again. Fukutaicho, huh? She would show him!

Shunsui extended an arm to her and slowly but surely, Nanao took it and they walked back together.

Nanao remembered it clearly. Back then he had come to her, so shouldn't it now be her turn? She wanted Kyouraku Shunsui, she wanted her taicho. As her taicho. As her friend. As her lover. Again. And this time also as something more. With a determined mind, Nanao got up from under the tree and started to go back to his house, she knew what she had to do now.

* * *

_A/N: First of all, sorry if there are more mistakes than usual, I didn't have the time to go over it more than once. I'm so stressed. So no promises of new chapters for the next week. Maybe the week after. Sorry_

_Thanks again to my lovely reviewers who take such precious time to let me know how I'm doing._

_Thanks: twOO..lAzy2lOgiN; InThisLife, and -dreamland. – sorry I couldn't reply to you ;)_

_Anyways, let me know what you think!_


	5. Novelty

**Chapter 5: Novelty**

"_Novelty has charms that our minds can hardly withstand"_

~William Makepeace Thackeray

* * *

Nanao went back to his house and surprise, surprise he still hadn't figured out that he should lock his front door. In normal circumstances, Nanao would never let herself in without knocking or having her taicho's consent but at that moment it didn't matter to her, so she let herself in, feeling only slightly guilty to invade his privacy.

She found him in the same room that she had left him, pretty much in the same position too. He was gazing out the window, seemingly not seeing anything.

"Kyouraku-taicho?" Nanao asked hesitantly. He looked kind of sad.

Shunsui jerked his head around to find his Nanao-chan standing in the room again. He had been thinking and thinking and he still couldn't figure out what had happened. Or how things had happened and considering that she had been the only other person present, he might as well ask her, he thought.

"Nanao?", he left off the –chan for once, "why ever did we have sex?" he asked without moving from his position on the floor, only looking up at her for a second.

Nanao sighed and also sat down on the floor, just a few feet from him. Potentially, this could be a long conversation, she thought.

Nanao looked over at him then started, "I honestly don't know." Shunsui looked over at her at that and watched her as she talked. He just couldn't figure out how all of it had happened. To be honest, he wasn't too sure he believed all this. "I mean, I certainly hadn't planned on it, and I'm quite sure you hadn't either. But you were drunk and you didn't know what you were doing until you kissed me and for a few seconds I was too shocked to react, I think, and then…" Nanao's voice trailed off but Shunsui was still watching her intently.

"Then…?" Shunsui prompted.

"Then, it actually felt really good." She said, maintaining very direct eye-contact and not looking away from him for a second.

"Nanao, I'm so much older than you, I didn't, didn't force you or anything, did I?" He asked very hesitantly.

"No! Gods, no." Nanao's voice was very adamant. "You didn't force me at all, it's just that until you kissed me, I hadn't actually thought about you, well …that way and then, I was curious, I guess, about all the rumours and such and it turned out to be the most amazing sex of my life." Nanao said brashly, putting her dignity on the line.

"And I was drunk?! I am certainly not at my best when I'm drunk." Shunsui mumbled as if to himself but Nanao heard and blushed just imagining what he could do when sober.

However, Shunsui caught the blush and chuckled lowly. Hnh, he hadn't thought he'd be doing any chuckling for a while. This was just too awkward but at the same time it was somehow comical, this whole situation. Shunsui had lived for a long time but this sure was a first.

Nanao looked away and Shunsui lounged back, so he was lying straight on the floor, one leg across the other knee.

"Ah, Nanao, I don't know what to say. I don't know what you want me to say."

"Don't say anything then." Nanao sighed. "For all the awkwardness now, I feel a lot better for having told you finally, to be honest."

"I can't imagine how it was for you, knowing all the while and not saying anything. I figured something was going on. You _were_ behaving a bit erratic but I could have never guessed anything of that magnitude." Shunsui looked at the ceiling now, so he didn't have to crane his neck to see her in his lounging position.

"Nanao, I'm-" He had wanted to apologize but Nanao cut him off before he could finish it.

"No! Don't say you're sorry, you have nothing to be sorry for, you can't even remember and you didn't do anything that I didn't want. So I didn't know that I wanted it but that doesn't change the outcome. I know you don't see me in a sexual way, at least not when you're sober. I know that. Even the "flirting" and teasing, I know you're not serious but-" This time it was Shunsui who cut her off by pulling her up into a standing position. Huh? Nanao hadn't even realized he had moved, let alone got up.

He looked down at her with serious eyes but there was something in it, a spark that she hadn't seen before.

"Alright, so let's try this... when we're sober." And there was a challenging glint in his eyes, as if he wanted to prove something to himself. If he was thinking about doing what she thought he was, then there was no chance that she would cry foul and damn the pain she'd feel later-on.

With infinite slowness Shunsui leaned down to her until his lips touched hers very hesitantly. So hesitantly that she could barely feel it. Before he could change his mind and do something stupid like pull back from the kiss, Nanao put her arms around his neck and opened her mouth under his, pulling him in deeper. For a second, Nanao thought he wouldn't take advantage of it but before she could amass too many doubts his tongue invaded her expertly.

Shunsui was out of control. He knew he shouldn't be doing this. Knew that this was not right. It wasn't really wrong though either. Nanao's body was pliant and soft under his hands and he decided to let himself feel. If he was going to hell, he might as well enjoy it.

He gripped her hips and propelled her back against the wall of the room and once Nanao felt the hard wall behind her and his hard body in front, a moan escaped her lips.

Shunsui ripped his lips from hers and looked down at her, breathing a bit harshly. She could see his eyes glittered but before she could decipher the look in them, he had covered her mouth once again.

Whatever he wanted to prove with this, Nanao was on board with it as long as he didn't dare stop it!

His mouth was devouring her, kissing, nibbling, licking, his tongue wet and hot against hers, not separating for a second and his body was flush against hers, pressing her into the wall deliciously.

Shunsui was feeling decidedly hot. He was kissing his Nanao-chan and it was explosive. Her little lithe body was undulating against his in a rhythm that made him lose his mind. He had started kissing her to prove that there was no chemistry between them, that he didn't feel for her what apparently she felt for him. He couldn't feel anything for his young charge, he shouldn't! But this! This felt like coming home. He had been sure about his feelings going into this situation but somewhere along the way, something had changed. A jolt was running through himm straight along his spine. He knew the feeling. He knew it well but he had never figured he would feel it with his Nanao-chan.

"What are we doing?" He brought forth harshly, separating their lips but Nanao pulled him back instantly, her arms around his head.

"Don't think. Please just don't think and feel!" Nanao whispered insistently against him before claiming his lips once again, like a drowning woman latching on air and apparently this was the last straw for Shunsui because he didn't try to stop them again.

He opened up her sash, confidently pulling it loose and letting her trousers fall to the floor. Her loose upper uniform soon followed her trousers to the floor. He hoisted her body up by her naked ribcage and Nanao instinctively wrapped her legs around his waist.

He was still dressed and he took advantage of the fact that she was naked by kissing every inch that he could reach.

Nanao was in pure bliss. She didn't know why he had started this to begin with but honestly she didn't care at that moment. She just wanted to experience this when both of them were sober.

Soon enough she felt him undress, until she clasped his naked waist and she was nearly sobbing for wanting to feel him inside her. Now. Now!

She tried to impale herself on him and Shunsui chuckled into her hair, grabbing her ass checks to manoeuvre her right where he wanted her. When he started to slide into her slickness, Nanao was holding him to herself tightly, her head pressed tightly into his neck. She didn't want to let go of him ever.

When he was fully sheathed inside her, Nanao sucked in a breath. She had nearly forgotten this feeling of fullness, of having him so deep inside her that she thought she would burst. She breathed harshly into his throat, gasping for air.

Shunsui had to use every ounce of self-control that he had amassed in his long long life to not simply start pounding into her. It felt so perfect! _She_ felt so perfect. She felt like the perfect sheath for his sword and he swore he would never leave again. Thrusting against her slowly he heard Nanao breathe in harsh gasps, the air stimulating his ears and making him shiver every time he was fully embedded inside her. She was holding onto him as if he was her anchor in this turbulent sea. And he loved it.

He had wanted to know what it had felt like to kiss her, like that boy in the bar. So he had just …done it, just to prove that it wouldn't work. For curiosity's sake but nothing could have prepared him for this. It felt as if he had been lost and now he was found.

By her.

Slowly, he accelerated their tempo against the wall until he felt her insides clasp him tightly and she bit his neck to refrain from screaming out her climax. She was pulsing all around him, massaging him ruthlessly which made him come right after her.

Once the last tremors left his legs, Shunsui stumbled away from the wall, continuing on to his bedroom while they were still connected. Arriving, he let them glide onto his bed, looking down at her face.

Both were breathing harshly in the room. The sweat on their bodies was cooling from the slight chill in the air.

Shunsui looked down at a naked Nanao and couldn't believe what he had just done, couldn't believe how good it had been, feeling her all around him – and he had forgotten this?

"I have forgotten about this?!" Shunsui asked aloud, voicing his thoughts.

Nanao needed three tries to speak, "Oh my! You weren't joking when you said you're not at your best when you're drunk. Wow. Well, now you have completely and utterly ruined me for any other man."

"Well, that's good since I have absolutely no inclination of ever letting you leave my bed again."

**~o~S~o~**

It was weird, Nanao contemplated, sitting at her office desk with Shunsui at his usual post on the couch, his hat pulled low over his face. A week had passed since that fateful night and her life, it seemed, had changed completely while at the same time not at all. Nanao wouldn't allow any intimacies to take place in the office, which Shunsui had grumbled about but accepted in the end, since Nanao had been smart and had demanded it while naked and in bed. So during the day, Nanao would reproach any and all of his advances while at night she invited them.

She knew that Shunsui was still trying to come to grips with all his feelings but that was alright since Nanao had had infinitely longer to come to terms with them than he did. Sometimes he still seemed unsure and apprehensive but Nanao hoped that would change soon enough.

However, there was a small niggling thought in her mind that just wouldn't leave her in peace. Was what they were having a relationship or just sex? Since they were trying to keep the rumours to a minimum, there were no dinners for two or leisurely walks around the Seireitei where anyone could see them. Their relationship was pretty contained to Shunsui's home.

Sooner or later something had to change.

The seemingly sleeping taicho of the 8th Division was thinking in similar lines. It was confusing to think how much his life had changed in just a week. He usually wasn't one for quick. Change had to come in slow currents not with a big explosion, which was probably why he tried to keep any new developments with Nanao to a minimum.

He adored her, there was no doubt about that. She had been a big part of his life since she was little. The 'r' word, as he had always called it in his mind, started to rear its head more and more often in his thoughts, until he was actually thinking of it as a genuine word: relationship. A word that would have made him run as fast as possible (and he had become pretty fast in his shunpo, he admitted to himself, for probably that very reason).

He probably wouldn't be good at it, though. Relationships and him just didn't mix. Never had. His motto had always been, life had to be lived to its fullest, being a Shinigami and a captain of the Gotei13 made him very aware that every day could be his last, but... Nanao. She deserved to be treated like a queen, and definitely not like a quick and easy fuck. Just the words made him swear to himself, how could he even think about Nanao with those words in conjunction?

He really had to think of something.

**~o~S~o~**

That night, when Nanao arrived at her destination, aka Shunsui's home she was composed and ready to talk the talk. However, once Shunsui had opened the door to let her into his home, all thoughts left her. Candles were strewn about the room, giving the house and intimate glow and Shunsui himself was dressed haphazardly in his Shinigami trousers uniform with the upper part opened even more than usually so you could now see his chest all the way down to his belly button.

"Come in." Shunsui said, his voice low and intimate when he kissed her temple, hello.

Nanao was still unused to expressing her feelings with all those little touches and glances that Shunsui seemed to be the master of. But she tried for a casual touch along his forearm under his wide sleeves anyways. She noticed that his captain's haori as well as his famed pink one were both missing, along with his hat. She was unused to seeing him in black but she certainly wasn't complaining since he looked absolutely hot, Nanao admitted but only to herself.

"What is all this?" Nanao asked carefully, seeing something peeking at her from the floor of his living room.

"This," Shunsui said with a grin, "this is a pick-nick."

"A pick-nick?" Nanao asked stupidly, now seeing the blanket spread out with various tasty looking little food stuffs arranged artfully.

"Yes, sometimes being creative certainly comes in handy." Shunsui smiled and led her, a hand on her lower back, to the scene. "Since we can't go outside at the moment, I thought I would just bring the outside to us."

She could see cushions and pillows that looked dreamily comfortable, but only on one side of the blanket. Before Nanao had time to wonder, though why that was, Shunsui had an arm around her waist and brought Nanao down with him effortlessly, making Nanao gasp a bit at the sudden movement.

Now Nanao was lounging with her back against Shunsui's front, while he was lying against the cushions.

"So, have you seen anything that has taken your fancy?" He was asking, looking over his work admiringly.

Nanao took time to relax against his front, which Shunsui responded to by tightening his arm around her middle, while she surveyed the food. Her mouth watered just looking at everything, she had to admit.

"Everything looks absolutely delicious, I don't think I could choose!" Nanao said exasperated.

Shunsui kissed the back of her neck and whispered deviously, "I know what I want but I guess that'll have to wait until dessert." And with that Shunsui established a rapport of innuendos and hot looks for the evening, over the little sandwiches and finger-food and wine.

After they had pretty much polished off all the food, Nanao feeding Shunsui and vice versa, Shunsui leaned back heavily, pulling Nanao over him so they faced each other.

They looked into each other's eyes and Nanao got the feeling that Shunsui wanted to say something but he kissed her instead. A slow, tongue curlingly wet kiss that had Nanao panting when they parted.

Shunsui sighed, looking straight into her eyes, his lids at half-mast and other things waking up. But he knew it had to be said,

"I think we should talk-"

"I think we should talk-"

They both said at the same time and then smiled at each other, Nanao nudged him to make him go first and laid her head heavily onto his broad shoulder, sleepy after so much food.

"Ah, Nanao, as good as this feels, being together with you like this, I have no idea where this is going."

Nanao didn't look up and just let him speak his mind.

"Just a week ago, I could have never fathomed this happening at all, being with you like this and now I just don't know what to think at all."

"Well, I have had much more time to get used to the idea of us being together, you _were_ kind of hit over the head with this." Nanao said, not moving from her comfortable position.

Shunsui had an arm around her waist and was stroking it, probably not even noticing that he was doing it. It just showed again that he was much more comfortable with tactile feelings than she was.

Shunsui chuckled and Nanao could feel it go through her body because of their close contact.

"Nanao, you know me. I'm not good with, you know...relationships."

Nanao snorted inelegantly at that.

"There you have it!" He said as if her snort had proved it all.

"And I don't think I'd be very good at it-"

"Do you think I would be?" Nanao asked, interrupting him, all serious now.

"Do you think I've got so much experience in relationships?"

"Well, I'm sure you've got more than I do." He grumbled.

"Hn." Nanao just snorted disbelievingly.

"Well," if she didn't know better, Nanao would swear that Shunsui was _blushing_! "I've got more than enough experience in the sexual part, that's true, but not the emotional."

"If you want to end this, just say so." Nanao said, trying to climb off of him but Shunsui wouldn't let her leave his body and just pulled her down again.

"I'm not saying that." He implored with honest eyes. "The truth is, I don't know what I want to be saying." Shunsui seemed tired and pulled a hand over his face. Truth was, they hadn't been sleeping much lately.

"Alright, so let's just try it. Let's go for it. If it does not work, alright, we will just have to think of something when the time comes but let's _really_ try it. Be in a relationship with all its ups and downs." Nanao said, looking into his eyes.

Shunsui looked down at her and kissed her instead of answering straight away. The kiss then took on a mind of its own, with Shunsui's hands pulled her frame tightly to his own and Nanao's hands slung around his neck, pulling herself up so she could reach him better. They broke off the kiss to get some air and looked into each other's eyes wonderingly.

Shunsui cradled her face and kissed her forehead lingeringly, "Alright." he whispered against her skin and it was the last thing that was said for quite some time.

Change will come upon you when you least expect it. And it won't always be welcome or sought after. Sometimes things are good as they are. Change might bring complications and pain. But sometimes...sometimes change might just bring about something glorious.

**The End

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_A/N: So that's it folks, thanks a lot for joining me once again for a journey into the amazingness that is Shunsui and Nanao's world. Thanks so much for all the lovely reviews I got, it's always amazing that other people like my fics XD. It also makes me want to write more ;)_

_I hope I was good and didn't forget to write back to anyone that wrote a review that I could reply to, for the others..._

_K – I'm glad you liked the chapter, Nanao truly is brave for facing him like that. I wish I was like that! Lol Thanks for the review!_

_-dreamland – Well, I'll tell you a secret: I'm much too impatient to see them together to keep them apart for too long ;) So never fear with my fics, I'd have to be truly restraining myself to not get them together within a minimum of chapters. Lol. Thanks!_

_-InThisLife – I hope I lived up to the expectations with this chap ;) I do try to keep them as much in character as I know how to write them, I'm glad that comes across! Thanks a bunch for the reviews!_

_I hope I didn't forget anyone ;) If yes, you can be (reasonably) cross with me. Lol._

_So, mind telling me what you thought about the chapter and the fic in general, I'd be much obliged! Also, I think I could make sequel, if you've got some additional ideas, I'm (very) open to hearing them XD._


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